I have many friends who are nurses and I know that nurses are a few of the most stressed people in the world because of all the problems in health care. It seems that no matter how hard they work, someone above them is saying that it's not good enough. As a physician, I take notice of the coping ways of great, loving, smart people under tremendous pressure.
What I've found is an extremely high rate of lousy coping ways, including smoking, eating, and drinking to excess. These are very devoted people, putting everybody else's needs in front of their very own. Seems like someone you know? If you are the caring, compassionate, put-everybody-else-first type of person, maybe you are using selfdestructive coping ways to handle the stresses in your own life. Just remember, you are not good to people you love and take care of if you are running down a self-destructive path.
It's time to put your needs first, even when others aren't accustomed to it. You will find the right and also the responsibility to deal with your health first. Think about the instructions you're given when oxygen masks drop with an airplane. You're told through the flight attendant to place your mask on before helping others. Treat every aspect of your health that way. The stronger you're emotionally and physically, the better you are for all those you love.
You've coping ways for each major person in your life and each part of your life. But they are they successful, positive coping ways, or are they self-defeating? Will they reduce stress in the long run or add to it? If you take a drink whenever you get home from work and then a few more before you can face the children or even the spouse and make dinner, is that the easiest method to treat your body and your mind? An amount help you both physically and spiritually and be better for you personally and your family?
How about stopping for yoga class on the way home, walking in the park on the good weather days, meditating for Quarter-hour in pure silence before the gang gets home, or dropping that extra project at work that's been causing all those extra hours? Perhaps your best coping mechanism might be setting limits for that superwoman or superman inside of you and also refusing to push yourself harder or refusing to let others push you into responsibilities that you wouldn't want or need.
Once you've targeted self-defeating coping ways, you must replace that which you don't want with something that is uplifting. If you only vow to prevent doing the destructive habit, you will not succeed. You must find something that is very pleasant to complete instead. When one of my overweight friends whom I coached finally admitted that she and her husband were drinking too much every night after work, she wasn't able to eliminate the habit until they came up with other fun activities to replacement for their nightcaps. She and her husband have both lost substantial weight from just that simple substitute in behaviors.
Think of a list of easy, stress relieving good-for-you activities. It may be as easy as taking a walk, getting into nature, listening to calming music, or having game night using the family. They may include reading a tale, calling a supportive family member, or sharing time with friends. These don't need to become time-demanding activities but should be included every day in your schedule. Add more active things to do, not since you have to but because you wish to.
Attempt to laugh, joke, sing, dance, or find pleasurable activities not less than an hour or so a day. Ensure that it stays positive and mentally and physically active. If you are doing something more passive, like television or movies, choose uplifting and humorous or silly topics. Avoid the depressing- search out comedy, joy, giggling, friends, and spontaneity.
I am a big believer in a daily regimen of at least 15 minutes of things i call "nonactive moments." Perhaps this could be prayer, meditation, or something that you'd otherwise feel is indulgent time. For me, it's time by the pool just watching the waves. Increase your "me" time away from energy- and mood-sucking activities.
Practice a practice of quiet moments, be it sitting on your porch and hearing the birds sing before you begin your day, or hearing some calming music while sitting in a dimmed room, or soaking in warm bath water before bed. This simple daily activity will not only lower your blood pressure level; it'll lower your stress level and improve your coping skills. Defend that time daily, and don't let anyone, particularly yourself, steal it from you.
The way that you cope with life is critical to your weight. Back in 1990, the University of California and Kaiser Permanente showed that obese ladies who confronted problems directly were much more likely to lose weight and maintain it permanently. 90 % from the formerly obese ladies who successfully lost the weight used that coping mechanism, whereas only 10 % of those that gained the weight back accomplished it! That's a remarkable statistic. Understand that the way you choose to cope with life's challenges will determine your weight. This truth is more important than what you consume or the way you exercise.
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1. 5 Steps to Mentally Prepare yourself for permenant weight loss
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